Be Strong, Be Intelligent and Smile

At 33 weeks, I was so sleep deprived; tossing and turning with unbearable discomfort throughout the night. The bed could accommodate only me. Throw cushions were all around – two on the side, a few more at the edge and not counting the piles of pillows needed to support my aching back. The bed resembled a war zone of pillows. And at week 34, I had thrown out my sleeping partner. Too bad, but I think he somewhat willingly did so. One zombie in the house was enough; he had no intentions of adding on to the number.

Results from my last check up had caused more worry. DrH told me that that my baby was still in the butt first position. My heart sank at the news. I had hoped for the baby to turn, but apparently she wasn’t listening to Mommy’s telepathic pleas. I hadn’t the faintest idea of what to expect with a C-section as the other two children were normal. Thoughts of being cut opened gave me the creeps.

My labour was intensive; almost forgot how to do the pushing. Mana tak nye, the last time I made my appearance before DrH was like eight years ago. Machines and wires were every where. I remember looking at the monitor, and not at all amused by the chart plotting my contractions. Each time the graph showed a spike I went berserk – grabbing the gas mask, piercing Abe’s arms, calling names at the nurses when they were slow at giving me my shot of pain killers. Even with that shot, the pain was urgghhhhhh……..

Anyway, after some serious and intense huffin’, puffin’ and pushing (and a few screams too!!), sometime around 6.30am, Nissa Maisarah was born. She was long and weighed almost 4kg. When DrH placed her in my arms, this bundle of joy gave her first smile, and just like that the agony from the wait and pain was gone. The rest I could vaguely recall. Tau-tau dah in the room, and the nurses just couldn’t wait to pass the baby to me to breast feed (in the end tak breast feed pun coz had problems in the milky dept).

Nine years ago, that was how it happened.

Happy birthday dear Nissa….

Believe in magic and wish on stars. Dance, laugh, cry, and sing when you want to. Make faces. Play with lumpur and lopak. Pet rabbits, hold kittens, and talk to babies. Love and trust and be compassionate. Be strong. Be intelligent. Smile.

No matter how many birthdays come and go, you'll always be our little girl. May each of your days be filled with joy and sweet surprises.

More of Nissa's stories here and here.